Human Resources

by Planet Scumm

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The issue 5 metafiction picks up with notes from our mascot's bounty hunter:

Alright, better pull up the wire, see if this Scummy character's kicked up a trail somewhere.

Hmm, looks like Jackson Lewis Monk's sighted some old automated apartment units waking up on the far side of this galaxy. Could be our slimeball is looking to squat there and lay low. Psych profile says the guy isn't that fond of robot companions, though--not "squishy" enough. Better load "The Tower" into the case file anyway, Z3B. Just in case.

Now look at this. What would an intergalactic war criminal and inveterate party rocker like Scummy want with a bunch of office drones? John Rodzvilla's "Quarterly Report on Trans-Dimensional Holdings" claims some Earther-like folks the next system over have been experiencing bizarre cosmic-level phenomena. Worse, they're using their newfound powers for capitalism.

Hey, check this out--another Earther story making the rounds. Damn if they're not all over the place! This has to be our goo-man's doing. Richard Wren's got a first-hand account from a whole Earther planet where machines do everything, and the people can barely think for themselves. Now, don't look at me like that, Z3B. You're one of the good ones. I mean, you're not, you're a hardened killbot, but that's why we hang around.

More humans! And so far away from their former home... Just what did you do, Scummy? This transmission from Paul Spears looks like genuine history from just under a hundred years ago--at first glance. But even I know Earthers never developed the technology OR the interpersonal communication skills necessary to bottle concentrated emotional residue. Get "Ain't We Got Fun" loaded up too, Z3B, then punch it to our first lead.


released October 5, 2018

Mixed & edited by Tyler Berd
Music by Andrew Chenevert and DJ Blazt
Narrated by Andrew Chenevert

Spark & Fizz Books 2018


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